Hey Everyone. It has been too long since my last post. Between school and hanging out with my girls and getting stuff around the house done (cleaned out the nasty rain gutters this morning!), life has been so exhausting. I have been, however, so overjoyed and energized by the dawning reality that Cara is cancer free, a realization that has been hitting me in stages. I thought the word "remission" would cause me to immediately jump up and down and be lost in the moment, but the joy is steady and subtle, mixed in with the other realities--this cancer has taken a heavy toll, Cara (and all of us) are weary, and now Jan is looking like she may have serious health issues related to her alarmingly low red blood cell count and kidney damage. To be perfectly blunt, it's hard to say how I feel moment by moment. The battle inside rages on.
But that is how life is, isn't it? Riddled with sin and doubt and questions, but more loved by God that we can every imagine.
I read Lamentations 3:31-32 the other day, while sitting on the rocks in Morro Bay, and it struck me as beautiful and so what I needed to hear: "For the Lord will not cast off forever, but though He cause grief, he will have compassion according to the abundance of his steadfast love."
Sure we face challenges right now, but we're going to be fine. When I'm overwhelmed, I need only to look at the huge grins on my girls' faces and see the strength in Cara's eyes. May joy be the undercurrent of our life, and Christ it's endless spring.
6 comments:
Dear Keith and Cara,
Stuff like this is why it's a privelege to pray for you - you both have written some AMAZING posts through this journey.
God Bless!
Keith, Cara and darling girls,
Thank you so much for sharing your heart, your struggles and your evident steadfast faith in our loving and merciful God. This journey of yours brings new meaning to Psalm 23; "yes although I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil for You are with me, Your rod and staff comfort me." I echo Joanie's comment: it is a privilege to be lifting you and yours to the Throne of Grace knowing you have been given eyes to see and ears to hear as the Spirit reveals light to your path. God is glorified in your lives!
"May joy be the undercurrent of our life, and Christ it's endless spring."
That is just *TOO* well stated to *NOT* be in a book somewhere! So... do you have a publisher lined up?....
Yeah, "remission" sounds so amazing! But it still has scary edges on it, so we're still prayin'!... and now for Jan, too.
Blessings to you guys-
Love,
Dad mike & the Hollister critters
keith, i'm in agreement with your parents, good words:
May joy be the undercurrent of our life, and Christ it's endless spring.
keep seeking Him!
piper said something similar:
http://aranahombre.blogspot.com/2006/12/trough-or-spring.html
Loving you through this and praying for Jan, too. Thanks for sharing and opening your hearts and lives and feelings through this journey. Love you guys. Love the little drummer. :)
you guys are still in the thick of it, but coming thru the other side. i pray Jan's health will improve and that she can get some solid answeres. hugs!
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